Justin's Whirled Headlines Issue #61
NOVEMBER 8, 2000

2000, Justin Thorne




Mugabe out TO GUN DOWN SANTA CLAUS by Christmas, opposition chief predicts

Dead man wins Missouri U.S. Senate seat, WHICH ISN'T SURPRISING WHEN YOU CONSIDER THE OPPOSITION

East German chief challenges conviction AS BIASED AGAINST COMMUNIST OPPRESSION

Iran's top woman politician faces court FOR ACTING TOO MUCH LIKE A MAN

Zanzibar ruling party claims victory, AND ASSERTS IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH CONTROLLING THE MILITARY

Another note found on body of Kursk sailor, READING 'THANKS FOR THE HELP, EVERYBODY'

Philippines president faces impeachment AND REPLACEMENT BY A GUY EVEN MORE CORRUPT THAN HIM

Arabs apathetic over US vote, BUT NOT AS MUCH AS AMERICANS ARE

Chinese officials sentenced to death in corruption case BY TRIBUNAL WE ARE SUPPOSED TO ASSUME IS IMPARTIAL

Britain promises FIFTY PERCENT cut in fuel taxes AS LONG AS EVERYONE BUYS TWICE AS MUCH FUEL

Saudi Arabia-Iraq border opened after nine years, TRAVEL BOOM NOT EXPECTED

Bush brothers agonize over HOW MUCH TO ADMIT TO IN TAMPERING WITH THE vote

New Somali government gets go-ahead for transition FROM IRRESPONSIBLE BASKETCASE TO INTERNATIONAL PARIAH

INCREASINGLY INCONTINENT Queen Mother 'putS her mark' on royal house

Finland apologises for expulsion of Jews AND EXPLAINS IT AS A CLERICAL ERROR