Justin's Whirled Headlines Issue #62
NOVEMBER 18, 2000

©2000, Justin Thorne


 
 
Clinton lands in Vietnam, ASKS 'SO WHERE ARE THOSE HOOCHIE-HOOCHIE GIRLS?'
 

Brazil works to tame Amazon RAIN FOREST WITH COMBINATION OF fires AND WHOLESALE DESTRUCTION
 

U.S. mediators nibbling away at Mideast tensions, REPLACING THEM WITH RESENTMENT OF THE U.S.
 

CLAMOR TO PICK UP NEW DIRECTOR'S CUT OF CANADIAN CULT CLASSIC 'Home brew' kills at least 68 in Nairobi area
 

Russia to crash Mir space station into Pacific AND CLAIM THEY DID IT ON PURPOSE
 

London's Millennium Bridge won't reopen until late next year, AFTER THE TRANSITION INTO THE NEW MILLENIUM
 

Israel unleashes 'cash weapon', CONFIRMING JEWISH STEREOTYPES
 

F-16 Collides with Small Plane CARRYING GORE BALLOTS in Florida; HAND COUNT OF DEBRIS EXPECTED
 

Sesame Street's Ernie makes '10 Worst Toys' IN SURVEY SPONSORED BY THE WALT DISNEY CORPORATION
 

Amtrak ACCIDENTALLY launches high-speed train INTO POTOMAC RIVER AT PUBLIC DEMONSTRATION
 

Radio reporter killed in Colombia AFTER SUGGESTING THAT THE DRUG TRADE MAY HAVE GOTTEN 'A LITTLE OUT OF CONTROL'
 

U.S. concerned about secret premium on Iraqi oil JUST IN TIME FOR ANOTHER PRESIDENT BUSH TO START A WAR OVER IT
 

Asian countries hold anti-piracy conference AS VENDORS OUTSIDE THE CONVENTION CENTER SELL RICKY MARTIN CD'S OF SUSPICIOUS ORIGIN
 

Castro claims exile group is plotting to kill him, WHICH ISN'T SURPRISING GIVEN THAT CASTRO'S HENCHMEN WOULD HAVE KILLED THEM IF THEY HADN'T FLED IN THE FIRST PLACE
 

Fujimori 'denies seeking asylum', CLAIMS HE'S ALWAYS WANTED TO 'VACATION' IN LIBYA