Select Quayle Topics: Fun and Games
It's not to keep him from running off our property. It's to protect my putting green.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle telling a guest at his house why his dog, Breezy, wears a special collar that emits a painful jolt of electricity should the dog try to run away. (reported in the NY Daily News, 6/30/92 -- taken from The Quayle Quarterly, Summer/Fall 92)

Great American sport. Horseshoes is a very great game. I love it.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 4/5/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

I've played there (the Burning Tree Country Club) before and I'll play there again. I'm not going to protest Burning Tree. Maybe they'll change. I think it would be a good idea for them to take women into the club. I don't have any problem playing there in the meantime.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle (from 'What a Waste it Is to Lose One's Mind' -- the Unauthorized Autobiography)

I felt like I was in charge.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle after working the locks of the Panama Canal locks during his visit to Panama City in January 1990. (reported in High Times, 11/92)

I could take this home, Marilyn. This is something teenage boys might find of interest.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, when purchasing a South American Indian Doll that, when lifted, displays an erection, 3/11/90 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

That's solid. There, you see how much I learned.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle when when visiting a welding class at a vocational school in Union, Missouri. He welded two scraps of metal together to demonstrate how much he had learned while in the National Guard. (reported in the NY Times, 10/25/88)

There. I paid for my ice tea and I even left you a penny.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle at Bob's Big Boy in Claymont, DE. The waitress who served Dan Quayle said he had given the cashier $1.00 for a 99 cent iced tea, said this, and then laughed. On a stop to a Delaware restaurant, in Feb. 1992, Quayle bought a coffee at Dempsey's Diner and left no tip whatsoever. On that occasion, he had just come from a $500 a plate fundraiser at the Hotel Du Pont. This time, after leaving his 1 cent tip, he went to a $250 a plate fundraiser at the Rodney Square Club in downtown Wilmington. (Wilmington News-Journal, 10/24/92)

I'm not so sure that I will miss Johnny Carson, but Johnny Carson will miss me.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle (reported in the Houston Chronicle, 5/22/92 - taken from The Quayle Quarterly, Summer/Fall 1992)