Justin's Whirled Headlines Issue #71
MARCH 27, 2001

2001, Justin Thorne




Taliban officials show demolished statues to foreigners, PROUDLY EXCLAIMING, 'SEE? TALIBAN CRAFTSMANSHIP.'
 

Israelis order evacuation of Arab district in Hebron IN ORDER TO STREAMLINE RETALIATION
 

Swiss ban arms delivery to Venezuela, CITING THAT ONLY 'SELECT NATIONS' HAVE THE RIGHT TO KILL
 

Wahid to face Indonesia's parliament FROM BEHIND BULLETPROOF SCREEN
 

German court rules Yahoo! not responsible for 'Mein Kampf' sales, POPULARITY OF HITLER PROBABLY HAS MORE TO DO WITH IT
 

Iraq divides Arab world INTO 'FRIENDS' AND 'TARGETS'
 

Burst reservoir floods Israeli, Gaza farmlands; ISRAELI AUTHORITIES TRYING TO FIND WAY TO BLAME ARAFAT
 

Police break up nuclear protest BY THREATENING TO IRRADIATE CROWD
 

FEARING NOTHING TO DO IN THEIR SPARE TIME, House of Lords shoots down ban on fox hunting
 

Howard Baker tapped REPEATEDLY BY MAID TO BE AWAKENED FROM AFTERNOON NAP for CALL FROM BUSH OFFERING Japan ambassadorship
 

Bush urged to restart North Korean missile talks AS SOON AS HE IS DONE WITH HIS COLD WAR EXPERIMENTATION
 

Brazil Indians outraged by minister's statements THAT 'INDIAN BABES PUT OUT'
 

Mass grave awaits British livestock, WHICH IS A LATERAL MOVE FROM BECOMING STEW
 

Killer with IQ of 60 prompts review of US death penalty TO LOWER MINIMUM IQ TO 50
 

Saudi clerics denouce Pokemon, AND GOD BLESS THEM FOR IT