Justin's Whirled Headlines Issue #70
MARCH 18, 2001

2001, Justin Thorne




Macedonian troops shell silent hillside AS MIMES RUN FOR COVER
 

Italians stunned by theft of famed banker's body, BUT AMUSED BY THE UNDERLYING IRONY
 

Four teens die in Jakarta crush as UK BOY band A1 sings, ESTABLISHING NEW BENCHMARK FOR WORST DEATH SOUNDTRACK
 

Spain car bomb found after blast kills policeman, WHICH OFFICIALS ADMIT MADE THE SEARCH A WHOLE LOT EASIER
 

Taliban may let press see smashed Buddhas, BUT ONLY IF THEY ALLOW THEIR WRITING HANDS TO BE AMPUTATED FIRST
 

Kuwaiti parliament deals new blow to women's rights TWO WEEKS AFTER THANKING THE FREE WORLD FOR SAVING ITS BISCUITS IN THE GULF WAR
 

FRightENED-Swinger escapes Colombia prison AFTER RUNNING INTO RECENT PARTNERS' INCARCERATED HUSBANDS
 

WITH AN APPARENTLY SHORT LIST TO CHOOSE FROM, Palestinian woman 'proud' of killing
 

A mad scramble by donors for plum ambassadorships MAKES BEST CASE POSSIBLE TO END SOFT MONEY DONATIONS IN AMERICAN POLITICS
 

Princess Anne fined for speeding, PRINCE CHARLES GIVEN WARNING WHEN EARS INTERFERE WITH POLICE RADAR
 

Fox wants Mexican oil company to be more competitive BY CLAIMING ITS OIL IS HIGHER IN VITAMINS AND MINERALS
 

Mir's orbit continues to drops slightly AS HIGH STAKES RUSSIAN ROULETTE MATCH CONTINUES FOR WORLD'S URBAN CENTERS
 

Awaiting a transition TO DEMOCRACY, Japan pushes for openness
 

Philippines out to reinvent itself for tourists AS MORE THAN A PLACE WHERE YOU CAN BE CAPTURED BY LEFTIST REBELS
 

Puffy Combs says trial changed his life, PROMPTING HIM TO CHANGE HIS NAME TO 'DEFLATED COMBS'