Issue #44
MAY 31, 2000

2000, Justin Thorne

Ethiopia says it has 'withdrawn' from western Eritrea BY HEADING EAST

Fiji military scraps multi-racial constitution, WAITS TO SEE WHICH RACIAL GROUP IT CAN MORE READILY EXPLOIT IN THE NEW ONE

UN chief congratulates Nigeria on first anniversary of democracy AS GROANS ERUPT FROM THE UN OFFICE GAMBLING POOL

Fujimori heading for third term as Peru's president FOR LIFE

TAKING ON THE TOUGH ISSUES RIGHT AWAY, Clinton begins European trip with praise for Portugal

Drivers' strike, CALLED IN PROTEST OF BEING REQUIRED TO DRIVE FOR A LIVING, again disrupts French trains

Belgium grows by 2000 square meters UPON ARRIVAL OF RUPERT MURDOCH AND HIS EGO

Survey: Over half of software used in Hong Kong pirated, PUTTING THE FORMER COLONY ON PAR WITH THE REST OF THE WORLD

Japan's leader tries to end scandal over 'divine nation' comment BY DENYING THE NANKING MASSACRE EVER HAPPENED

Pakistani police ask women to cover heads, keep low profile in public, OR THE RIOT GEAR WILL HAVE TO BE BROUGHT OUT

Ontario announces new water test rules after E.coli outbreak, NAMELY THAT E.COLI IN THE WATER IS NO LONGER ACCEPTABLE

Pinochet undergoes heart tests at hospital, PLAYS 2 HOURS OF FULL COURT BASKETBALL, returns home

Briton sets off to North Pole in balloon, IS EXPECTED TO TOUCH DOWN IN MOROCCO ON FRIDAY

U.S. reportedly uncovers new evidence against Pinochet IN THE NIXON ARCHIVES, FILED UNDER 'IDEAS'

Breaking with protocol, Roman children mob pope to hug and kiss, AND ARE PROMPTLY EXCOMMUNICATED