Issue #41
APRIL 21, 2000

2000, Justin Thorne

Psychological trauma courtesy of the U.S. Government



Olympics chief warns that Athens could lose 2004 Summer Games IF THEY DON'T COME UP WITH SOME COLLEGE SCHOLARSHIPS AND 50 CASES OF OLIVES QUICK

Senior Chinese official charged with taking bribes to marry mistress, WHICH MUST HAVE SEEMED LIKE A VERY GOOD DEAL TO HIM

Italian opposition leader demands immediate elections BECAUSE HE IS EAGER TO USHER IN THE 158TH POSTWAR GOVERNMENT IN ITALY

Clinton says there's 'no conceivable argument' to keep Elian from father, EXCEPT THE 'LITIGATION FOR LITIGATION'S SAKE' ARGUMENT WHICH IS QUITE POPULAR IN THE U.S.

Russian parliament will consider nuclear test ban treaty on Friday, REJECT IT ON MONDAY

Nations agree to protect big animals, but not basking sharks, WHO ARE TO BE MERCILESSLY SLAUGHTERED TO SATISFY THE FRUSTRATIONS OF GAMEHUNTERS WORLDWIDE

Debating Jesus' last steps, WHICH AFTER 2000 YEARS PROBABLY HAVEN'T LEFT ANY REMAINING FOOTPRINTS

Britons WHO THOUGHT FREE SPEECH WAS PROTECTED detained in Sweden after Nazi salute shouted

'SPICY Egyptian mummy wrap' among Louvre's latest POPULAR FOOD COURT acquisitions

Austrian chancellor stresses importance of EU membership FOR ARYAN NATIONS

Sudan suspends air raids against southern rebels FOR 24 HOURS TO ALLOW THEM TIME TO COLLECT THEIR DEAD

Poll: Fujimori, Toledo in dead heat for Peru's runoff TO SELECT A NEW DESPOT

Effects of global warming clear in Canadian Arctic, WHERE FROZEN ICE PACK HAS BEEN REPLACED BY STEAMY MANGROVE

Chile court delays hearing on Pinochet immunity SO HE CAN PLAY SOME GOLF

John Paul washes feet of clergy in Holy Week ceremony, REPORTEDLY COMPLAINING OF 'SERIOUS STANK'