China toughens rules to halt sales of fake Viagra FROM ANY SOURCE OTHER THAN GOVERNMENT CLINICS
 

Tens of thousands turn out to BE DESPERATE FOR AIR TIME ON CNN, PRETEND TO BE mournING DEATH OF Ukraine nationalist leader
 

Primakov heading to Yugoslavia on Tuesday TO MAKE A GROWING PROBLEM WORSE
 

Court rules Pinochet's lawyers can fight extradition decision ON PAY-PER-VIEW
 

New Yorker reports Iraq paid Primakov for nuclear information, WHICH INCLUDED INTERACTIVE PICTORIAL TITLED 'YOUR FRIEND, THE ATOM'
 

Mitchell, STATESMAN FROM THE LAND OF 20,000 HAND GUN DEATHS PER YEAR, says IRA disarmament 'must occur'
 

IMF chief differs 'SLIGHTLY' with Russian officials on status of loan package, AS RUSSIANS CLAIM HAVING COMPLETED 20 BILLION DOLLARS IN REPAYMENTS, AND IMF CHIEF SAYS THE FIGURE IS ACTUALLY $2.60 AND A BUY ONE-GET ONE FREE COUPON FOR CHEX BRAND CEREAL
 

Puerto Ricans for statehood keep fighting IN THE STREETS, HURTING THEIR PROSPECTS SIGNIFICANTLY
 

Latvian immigrant pleads not guilty to spying on Israel, BUT ADMITS BEING A SORT OF 'NATIONAL SECURITY BUFF'
 

Thai police reportedly free 4 North Korean officials FROM CERTAIN STARVATION BY GRANTING POLITICAL ASYLUM
 

Repentant Filipinos to be nailed to crosses for Good Friday, JESUS EMBARRASSED
 

Japan's defense chief reportedly wants aggressive defense laws, ENACTMENT OF SPECIAL LEGISLATION WHICH OFFICIALLY DECLARES NANJIN MASSACRE IS FIGMENT OF WORLD'S IMAGINATION
 

Progress reported in DECIDING WHAT RESTAURANT THE BUFFET FOLLOWING China's WTO negotiations WILL BE HELD AT
 

DOC BRICKER'S LOVE BOAT II Rocket launched from floating Pacific PRINCESS platform
 

Adventurers begin 24,800-mile ultralight flight TO FIND NATION WITHOUT A MCDONALD'S